Blabber

"Never share what's not your news to share."

I have never felt this more than how much I am feeling it tonight. Why are people always so disappointing?

Happy

It's been such a happy day it felt like I needed to document this down. :') Had a very rare day off where I felt empowered and up for meeting people the entire day (I usually am so tired I just stay home to rest or just wake up late and meet one person over a meal if I planned to). Made the effort to wake up early to run simple happy errands like getting surprise coffee and snacks for happy friends, spent the afternoon over current favourite food and hours-long chat celebrating the birthday of my dearest friend, ventured a park and played the swing (which made me really happy!), and ended the day with a happy dinner catching up on a full 6 years I've missed with a friend I thought I've lost for good.

At least for today, my heart feels so so full like all the broken are mended, and I feel a kind of happy I haven't felt in a long while. Right now, I'm just trying to relish in all the happy for as long as I can. What is your happy today? :-)

Lost

Where do I begin? I find myself visiting the past more often than not these days. Those wonderful, happy times when I still had the most precious and closest friends by my side. I know that everything happens for a reason, but I think I'm still stuck because I haven't found that reason and many times I find myself asking why it all happened the way it did. Lost everyone, hurt and broken. I miss what once were sorely, and it brings me to tears all the time knowing I can never have such bonds with anyone again. They say take heart in what you once had instead of hurting over what you've lost, but isn't it really the same thing?